In Agra, I was staying in Imperial
Hotel, built in the Victorian style, where I had a huge room with a very tall
ceiling but a small window. After returning from the university, I usually preferred
to work using my personal table and chair in hotel’s overgrown lawn having palm
trees and flowers. Occasionally, my Indian friends from the university also visited
me in the lawn. One afternoon, Mr. K. visited and asked me if I knew the meaning
of Mahatma and would like to meet a one. I was surprised with the question, but
replied that I know and I would very much like to see an Indian Mahatma. Mr. K.
said smilingly that your desire was fulfilled instantaneously. Our Sripad Baba
ji, a great Mahatma, has expressed his desire to have meeting with you. I was
overjoyed to know this and enquired when and where it may occur. "Now and
here in the lawn” said Mr. K. As soon as Mr. K finished his sentence, the Mahatma-
a young man of medium height, with long curly hair, wearing a yellow dhoti-
arrived in the lawn. Mr. K. prostrated at the feet of Mahatma, sprinkling the
dust of his feet on his head. I stood up embarrassingly and bowed in the usual manner
of greeting. Mahatma smiled. Then, I looked at his eyes. They were unusually large
and brown with a frown, penetrating into the very heart of mine. I understood
that Mahatma could see through me. Therefore, it was useless to hide anything from
him and to be hypocritical. By gesture he ordered someone to bring another
chair for himself and sat down smilingly in the lotus posture. Chief and all
the servants of the hotel prostrated at his feet and ran to receive his orders.
After prostrations, they stood at a distance and looked at him with
indescribable awe. Sripad ji told me in Hindi that I read your interview in a
local newspaper, The Hindustan Times where you were in a conversation with a well-known
journalist Haridatta Sharma.[1]
It seems that you mainly desire to follow the footsteps of Surdas and want to
peruse the manuscript of "Sursagar”[2]
at the earliest.
I confirmed adding that it is
even difficult for me to understand bhakti (devotional) poems of Surdas about Sri
Krishna, which inspired my camping here. Sripad ji paused and asked what I know
of bhakti - the religion of love. I then knew little about bhakti. However, I
knew that it is useless to engage in medieval Indian literature without knowing
the bhakti. Sripad ji Maharaj said that Haridatta Sharma you have acquired too
many qualifications and titles. But, Russsian Radha (Krishna's beloved) wants
to learn bhakti. Sripad ji asked me “Are you ready for bhakti”? I rose from the
chair and answered in affirmative. Well then follow me now for a tour and replace
your western clothes with a sari. In the confusion, I said, I do not know how
to put on a saree, nor do I have one. "No problem it is easy and fixable”
said Mahatma. In the meantime, collect all your belongings from the hotel”.
Looking into the eyes of Sripad ji, I realized that I would go anywhere with Mahatma
and requested Mr. K. to inform Dr. Mataprasad Gupta everything. I had no idea
at that moment that how my embassy would react to my extraordinary act.
I collected dictionaries and
books from the room hurriedly and at the same time was very afraid that
everything was happening like a mirage. I was led through the hotel lawn to a
car parked at the gate, in which I was seated in the front seat along with Sripad
ji next to the driver. Five persons were accommodated in the back seat of which
I knew Mr. K. and graduate student R. Nobody told me about our destination. On my
question about where we were going, Sripad ji only smiled. How did I then explain to
myself? All races say that you cannot ask questions to a mahatma himself; if he
thinks fit he will explain. The Indian etiquette should therefore not be
curious, particularly in a relationship with a well respected overshadowing
Mahatma.[3]
We stopped at two-storey mansion in a locality of Agra where we were offered snacks
upstairs on the roof, which often replaces Indian home living. There, we waited
for the home owners who, with the extraordinary reverence, greeted Sripad ji
and me. All of us sat down on mats on the floor, where we were offered lovely
meals. Sripad ji was served first, but he ate little. Sripad ji made it sure that
I was given satwik khana i.e. food without pepper and hot spices. After
eating, we rinsed our mouth and washed our hands according to the Indian custom.
Thereafter, we sat down again on the roof on mats.
Sripad ji picked up a big
bundle kept there from which he picked up a lovely antique miniature image of Sri
Krishna. Showing Him, he explained to me that this particular image of Sri
Krishna was called Srinath ji which was sacred to the sect of "Pushti”
marg (tradition). Saint Surdas also belonged to Pushti” marg and was one of the eight main
poets of the sect. Such miniatures are now drawn in Nathdwara at Hare Krishna
center of miniature art.[4]
While all were admiring Sri Nath ji, the deity of Nathdwara, the landlord
brought a camera and photographed our congregation on the roof of the house with
the permission of Sripada ji. Thereafter, everyone left for resting. I was left
in the company of Mrs. Shanta Khandelval- a beautiful stately woman with huge
black eyes and a friendly smile. Mrs Shanta immediately became my choicest
friend and remained since then a closest one in my life. She helped me put on a
sari brought with her. She facilitated my comfortable stay and conversations
with others. No matter wherever I traveled, pretty Shanta has always been next
to me. It turned out that among those present at the dinner one of the men was
her husband, Banarsidas Khandelval, a businessman owning a shop of modern
sanitary equipment in Agra. Khandelval family, with their children and
relatives, followed the sect of "Pushti Marg" in which Surdas is
revered as one of its eight great saint poets. In the Samaj (congregations of
singers) in Krishna temples dedicated to "Pushti” marg, singing of padas
(lyrics) of the saint Surdas are sung with music routinely and regularly.
Shanta too adored Surdas and sang his padas, while playing tanpura- an
important musical instrument.
By evening, we again started our travel. An hour
later when it got dark and night sky was lit with bright stars and the moon, the
car reached to a forest clearing on the bank of Yamuna River. The place was
called Gaughat situated at Runakta village where saint Surdas met his mentor Swami
Vallabhacharya and used compose and sing his poetries.[5]
The place looked wiled, only an old abandoned water well testified that some
people once inhabited it. At the direction of Sripad Maharaja ji we carefully
spread mats on the ground and sat down to listen Shanta’s beautiful singing of the
poetries of Surdas. My knowledge of the Vraj language in which the poetry of
Surdas is written was meager, but I could distinctly hear the final strokes
concluding each hymn: "Surdas sang." Time slipped by unnoticed. Sripad
ji went into deep meditation. Coming out from it, he advised everybody to take rest
or go for sleep. Most of the people began to settle down to sleep in the car
itself and some near to the car on the ground. I was struck by the ability of
Indians to sleep anywhere and in any position. Because I was extremely
sensitive and lacked habit of sleeping on the ground, that too under the open
sky, I rejected a proposal to sleep in the jam-packed car. Instead, I
resolutely sat on the ground to enjoy the full moon view.
I was told that nobody had ever
seen Sripad ji sleeping. But, he could meditate at any hour of day or night, at
any place and under any circumstance. Noticing me sitting lonely with my head
raised to the sky, Sripad ji called me saying "if want to meditate, you
can do it now? I replied “I do not know how to mediate, although I
theoretically know what it is." Sripad ji, judging by my voice in dark, said:
"Sit down next to me. Look at the moon, concentrate on and chant the name
of Krishna." I followed his instructions in toto. I suddenly felt an aura
of light behind me which was surely not the moon light. Gradually light globules
filled the space between the ground and the sky. At the same time, I felt
weightlessness, as if law of gravity was broken, launching me into the shining
sky. On the one hand, there was a growing desire in me to fly in the shining
sky, on the other, a voice inside me whispered, "But you cannot return."
Sanity had reached its limit; I was scared and said to myself, "I must come
back to earth; I am not ready to go to the shining stars". This idea
immediately materialized in action. I came back from this experience of Nela
galaxy. Distant sky was still strewn with bright stars and the moon but magic
light disappeared. I stirred stretching my legs which got stiffed due to sitting
for a long duration in the unaccustomed sitting posture. I looked at Sripad ji sitting
next to me; he shuddered as if he was slowly recovering from the meditation. In
the moonlight, his appeared fine. He said "you did not trust me and were afraid
to enter into the domain of divine light; you need to know that I could always
bring you back to the earth." Subsequently, many Bhaktas enquired me about
this esoteric experience and were jealous of his favours to me. I must admit
that I was not disposed to yoga practices. Somehow I am convinced with the
writings in the olden Indian books of respected Maharishis that women should
not practice rajyoga, leading to the state of samadhi (trance).
Particularly, hath yoga never attracted me. In spite of this, Sripad ji Maharaj
tried several times to attach me to yogic meditation. He granted me devotional
meditation later after noticing my indifference and lackluster efforts towards
yoga meditation.
It was in Agra as well as in the
wild forest that I heard for the first time the live singing performances of the
verses (padas) of the poems of Surdas being sung in the tradition of the
"Pushti Marg." In the future, during my more serious engagement with
Krishna bhakti and creative writings of Surdas, Sripad ji repeatedly sent me to
various live programmes where I listen to the beautiful lyrics of Suradas in the
Samaj singing style. Later, I too learned to sing many of my favourite padas of
"Sursagar". After spending
whole night in the wild forest, we started next morning for a detour to
various places associated with saint Surdas. Sripad ji told everyone to enter into
a hut called surkuti wherein he gave me flowers for laying to the images
of Krishna, Surdas and his teacher Vallabhacarya. Each one of us, except me, sang
a pad of Surdas glorifying Krishna. It was evident that they sang from the
heart their favorite and familiar verses. Shanta began to teach me how to sing the
pads of surdas and play tanpura. Thereafter, we all went to bathe in the
Jumna. After bathing, we proceed to a famous lake, through the forest thicket.
Since time immemorial, this place is considered sacred. Bringing me to lakeside,
Sripad ji showed me the tree that Krishna used for jumping into the lake. At
that moment, I was astonished to clearly see in the body of the tree boy
Krishna figuring. When I reported this to Sripad ji, he laughed. When I
narrated this incident to Shanta and Gopal, they unanimously declared that Sripad
ji granted me a "darshan" (vision) of Sri Krishna and felt terribly
jealous of me.
On another occasion, while
taking bath in Chandra Sarovar, a pond at Parasauli- the place where saint
surdas performed his sadhana. I lost my amber necklace and was a little upset. When
this news spread, the people gathered around the pond to try to find out my necklace.
However, they could not succeed. Suddenly, a five year old little boy with curly
hair ran up to me and handed over the necklace. I tried to hug the boy in
feeling of love and gratitude, but he ducked away and disappeared as suddenly
as he had appeared. Shanta and other bhaktas froze in amazemen and began to
say: "It's been very Krishna! You're greatly blessed to receive his favour
with His darshan”. Of course, this is all due to the grace of Sri Maharaj ji
Pad. Permeated with this consciousness, I offered my thanks to the altar of
Shri Krishna at a temple. I must say that Sripad ji granted me repeatedly such experiences
and "darshan". Gopal Pandey and other bhaktas confidently told me
several times that since Sripad ji is an avatar of Shri Krishna, he can do
wonders. However, such experiences are given only to those who seek to realize
God through bhakti. I soon realized that without an understanding of bhakti one
cannot understand the creative writings of Surdas. There are many important books
in Sanskrit (e.g. Narad Bhakti Sutra) and Tamil (Tamil Prabandhas), but all
require knowledge of these languages. Surdas is accepted in the first place as
a great devotional poet, therefore, it is absolutely necessary to immerse in the
world of bhakti to understand and follow his writings. Without this, in my
view, any study or research on the writings of Surdas would be reduced to the
"Europeanized formalized scheme" by which one cannot appreciate and
understand the creativity of Surdas. I must say that Sripad ji Maharaj helped me
tremendously and inducted me into Bhakti by granting several personal and
spiritual experiences.
Sripad ji Maharaj was also a
"learned" mahatma, who read and collected manuscripts on bhakti
literature in Braj, Awadhi and Sanskrit languages and had great interest in
Indian classical music. No wonder he founded "Vraja Academy” during the
mid 1970s for the promotion of Vraj culture and bhakti. Thanks to Sripad ji, I
was now better equipped to capture the spiritual essence in the poetic writings
of Saint Poets of Vraja. Soon I together with Sripad ji boarded into a bus with
pilgrims of Rajasthan. First of all, I wanted to peruse, the famous manuscript
of Sursagar. However, I became acquainted with a number of medieval manuscripts
containing the padas of Surdas. In addition to a rare opportunity to see the
manuscripts in the temple libraries of Rajasthan including Sri Nathdwara I also
met the Maharaja of Jaipur. Later, I also visited Vrindavan and other places of
Vraj region including Parasouli, the sadhana sthali of Surdas. Rare
manuscript of Surdas is a collection of pads on the life Krishna in Braja which
are sung and performed by the artists and even visitors in Radhe-Krishna
temples in Rajasthan. Well versed in reading of these manuscripts Sripad ji
helped me not only in reading these manuscripts but more importantly to
understand the content and esoteric meanings of these verses.
Sripad ji was not only well
versed with the bhakti tradition of the olden days, but also had keen interest
in all modern achievements of civilization. Therefore, "Vraj Academy"
was one of the first institutions in Vraj region to acquire a computer. Sripad
ji very quickly mastered all kinds of computer related wisdom. In his
direction, Vraja Academy extensively used computer for preparing materials for organizing
its conferences and seminars at Vrindavan. Vraja Academy also has a large
collection of rare manuscripts, books, miniatures and artifacts of medieval
bhakti period. In my later visits to Vraja Academy, I was pleasantly surprised to
watch Swami ji at the computer or phone or reading English newspapers. Imagine
a typical Indian Sanyasi in a loincloth with long hairs upto waist holding up an
antique white phone. However, all the movements of Sripada ji were so natural
that it fitted into any environment, whether Himalayan Cave, the presidential
palace, a peasant hut or a palace of the king. Sripad ji’s eyes, shaded by
thick, curved lashes were full of light sparkle. He had wonderful thin,
flexible fingers of a musician! He even taught me how carefully one should unroll
a manuscript. He instructed me not to breathe directly on such a sacred
manuscript as the breathing could "desecrate" it. Once in the temple of
"Banke Bihari", a goswami (the priest) in the presence of Sripad
ji showed me the glass jar with the vials of liquid perfumes meant for the service
of Shri Krishna. I leaned over and began sniffing one of viles. Pujari grabbed
the bottle out of my hands, uttering something in annoyance. Sripad ji explained
to me that I had profaned the perfume by inhaling through my breath. Now this cannot
be used for the purposes of puja and for decoration (sringar) of Shri Krishna.
He took from Pujari the dinky little bottle with a dark brown oily liquid and
gave it to me for the service of my Krishna idol at home. On another occasion, Sripad
ji gave me a bronze idol of Gopal Krishna (baby Krishna) with butter in his
right hand, along with the items needed for his decoration - his clothing,
jewelry and a collection of perfume bottles. Later in 1974, I was presented
with bronze idols of Krishna and Radha along with skillfully made silk and
brocade skirts, saris, blouses, dhoti, scarves, blankets colored beads, gold
thread, pearls, hats, and crowns for decorations of the idols. Once Sripad ji
maharaja explained to me that sringara or decoration of the deity Krishna in
the temple combined with his adoration, arati with lights and singing kirtan
increases the intensity of bhakti. That is why the most famous Krishna temple
in Vrindavan, such as "Banke Bihari" and "Radha Vallabha" decorate
the deities and perform araties and offer tasty foods to them several times in a
day. This is also called astyam seva (eight times service) to God including
"Mangala Arati", "Dhup Arati", "Sringara Arati",
"Rajbhoga Arati", "Sandhya Arati”, "Bhoga Arati" at
dinner time and last "Shayan Arati" when Shri Krishna is laid to
sleep at around 9 PM.
Sripad ji had no permanent place of residence and regular times for meeting
people. He used to disappear or appear suddenly whenever and wherever he wanted
it to be necessary. Thus, no one could tell exactly where he was and when he
could be seen. Sripad ji Maharaj more often chose to visit the temple of "Banke
Bihari" at the time of "sringar arati”. I remember that many Bhaktas (devotees),
including those from afar, came to the temple of "Bank Bihari"
looking for Sripad ji but not all succeeded in seeing him. Sometimes some people
were fortunate to catch him searching his tracks. I remember one of the cases
of such "disappearances". Bhakti Group comprising five people, including
Shyam and me, was traveling together with Sripad ji in the foothills of the
Himalayas. At some point of time, however, Sripad ji disappeared. Several hours
passed but no one of us could find him. We began to panic as none of us had any
idea where we were. Adults with honorable positions in society suddenly became helpless
children. I too decided to look for Sripad ji. Knowing his habit of hiding in
the most uncomfortable places for a man, I suggested that we should look for Sripad
ji in nearby thorny bushes. However, I did not find anyone there. I told Shyam
that, as per Bhagavata Puran, Shri Krishna disappeared even from his beloved
gopis in the forest. Shyama corrected me saying that Sri Krishna went “antardhyana"
i.e. He assumed the state of non-survival or un-manifestation. I recalled that
once Sripad ji told me that Bhagavan can be in the state of non-survival or
manifestation or Nirguna or Saguna. Sri Krishna - manifested as saguna (with
qualities and form) but his everlasting state is nirguna (without form and
qualities). In the meanwhile Shyama while photographing me found Sripad ji sitting
in meditation under a large tree in the bushes. I still have that photograph.
Ready to leave, I looked back and saw just a scratch away Sripada ji sitting in
meditation. Shyama, frozen in amazement, automatically pulled the trigger. At
the same time, Sripad ji straightened and stood up. I exclaimed "This is
You Gurudeva, not a mirage, but a while ago you were not there”. All of us have
been looking for you. Nobody knew what to do, where to go. Sripad ji grinned and
replied that he was sitting in meditation among these bushes under the tree, but
you could not see me. As your appearance and photographing distracted me, therefore,
I broke my meditation. Bowing her head low Shyama begged forgiveness with
folded hand from Gurudeva for photographing him without his consent. "I
know, dear Gurudeva, without your consent we cannot do anything! But, kindly
leave the testimony of your antardhyana imprinted on the pictures.” I said joining
Shyam’s requests. Sripad ji agreed. Thus, I have two significant pictures of
that event. In on one of them in the bush under the tree no one is visible, in
the other one Sripad ji visibly exist. I still cherish the memory of this
photographic event.
(Source: Photographs and Excerpts from a translation of an essay published in Aryavarta Herald, 2008 (10) in Russian language by Late Prof. N. M. Sazanovoy)
[1]
It was revealed to me later that Sripad ji visited
the home of Shri Banarsidas and Smt. Shanta Khandelwal before my first meeting
with him and showed them the Haridatt Sharma’s newspaper article with my prominent
portrait and a title "Russian Radha". After reading the article, Sripad
ji expressed his desire for a meeting with me which was arranged with the help
of professors of Agra University.
[2] A
major book of poems of Saint Surdas.
[3]
Sripad Maharaj ji by that time was widely known as
a mahatma and mystic saint in Agra, Delhi, Prayag (Allahabad), Varanasi
(Benares), Haridwar, several places in Rajasthan and North and Central India. After
Sripad ji’s pilgrimage to South India in the early 1970s, he was also known to
various people and places in South India. Ten years after the first meeting
with Sripad in Agra, we were again together in Hyderabad at the invitation of Hon’ble
Chenna Reddy, then Governor of Andhra Pradesh.
[4]
Thanks to liberal gifts of Sripad ji, I have now
several collections of similar miniatures.
[5] Many years later Dr. Srivastava created "Memorial
Society of Surdas" at Runkta in honor of the poet, Shri Surdas.
